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Forum: Site Goals and Ideas
Thread (Discussion): Information in private messages - explicitly or implicitly confidential? - Private means private
Message 155914
Posted by steve
on Jul 12, 2005 03:16 PM | Also by steve
| Gender: Male,
Age Bracket: 30 - 39,
State: Virginia,
Country: United States |
A recent post led me to create this thread.
Should the information shared in PM between two users here be considered implicitly confidential, or only confidential if one person explicitly states it is? I thought there was a forum guideline about sharing information from a Private Message or email without the other user's permission, but apparently not. That was addressed a while ago, but I think it's time to revisit it.
I'd like to add a forum/site guideline that covers this, once I settle on the guideline with the input of others.
Also, would it be helpful if I add the text from the guideline to one or more parts of the Private Message process?
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Message 155918 (In Reply to Message 155914)
The recent post in question
Posted by steve
on Jul 12, 2005 03:19 PM | Also by steve
| Gender: Male,
Age Bracket: 30 - 39,
State: Virginia,
Country: United States |
confusedgf's post
My reply
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Message 156118 (In Reply to Message 155914)
Posted by Scaye
on Jul 14, 2005 04:49 AM | Also by Scaye
| Gender: Male,
Age Bracket: 21 - 29,
State: N/A,
Country: United States |
I'd say if the other party allows you to post it openly it's fine. But a private message is private and should be between those two people. If a forum rule is broken they can be reported.
In the end, how can a forum poster really prove another poster wrote something? There are no handwriting traces on the internet.
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Message 156163 (In Reply to Message 156118)
steve and others
Posted by 1dadof5
on Jul 14, 2005 03:54 PM | Also by 1dadof5
| Gender: Male,
Age Bracket: 30 - 39,
State: Indiana,
Country: United States |
i think it is appauling that some here would share what is dicussed via PM and expected to remain in confidence, with the rest of the members in the forums.
I must admit, its happened to me. One poster who learned who i was via PM decided to share it with a few others, much to my dismay. How did I find out? the CEO called me into his office and inquired why someone called to try and find out all about me. I wont out that person as i wont do something like that. I will give you a hint. it was a poster in the south.
If its discussed in PM, it should be absolutely private between the parties involved. people like Orolan, Nav1 among others respect that while others dont. Some of us respect others privacy so much that some of us actually communicate by regular email and dont go spewing each others private details on a public forum. Indeed, there are a few of us who know a lot of info on others here on these forums and actually respect those peoples right to privacy especially when some of them have such a moral high ground on the forums. More than a few would be suprised to hear what others here have been arrested for over the years.
If this place is going to work, every one of our rights to privacy should be protected. No one is a better example than Steve himself. As site administrator, he could get the "dirt" on all of us if he wanted b/c im sure that we all have things we dont want others her to know. but he has respect for those that visit here.
Some of you need to take that example and respect the rights of others
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Message 156190 (In Reply to Message 156163)
Dad
Posted by dp1
on Jul 15, 2005 12:35 AM | Also by dp1
| Gender: Female,
Age Bracket: N/A,
State: Florida,
Country: United States |
Did the person tell the CEO your username or the name of this site? Just curious. I think it would be particularly damaging in your case since you present yourself as a non-sex offender. In other words, if you truly are not a sex offender in the real world and people thought you were posting on a sex criminals forum that in itself might send the wrong message.
One time there was an in depth discussion on this forum about a case. The name was left out to protect the person. I did not know the name of the case at the time nor did I make an attempt to research it since a lot of the issues in the public forum were privacy act issues. Anyway, about a month or so after this extremely long debate, I get a PM from the real person thanking me for all my comments about his case. He said he found the post by doing a search online. I'm freaking out because I don't even know this guy and I knew for a fact he didn't post here. Well at the end of the PM he signed his real name. I cautioned him about identities. I hope that if he reads this post he's careful about what he posts. Sex offender's sometimes have some incredible amount of media attention not to mention their addresses posted on the internet. Catch my drift?
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Message 156207 (In Reply to Message 156163)
Posted by dp1
on Jul 15, 2005 02:29 AM | Also by dp1
| Gender: Female,
Age Bracket: N/A,
State: Florida,
Country: United States |
I've admitted to knowing some identities in open forum, but I down play it as much as possible. How or why I know or who I know professionally, personally or email with or chat is no one's business. Although I have to say that the people who've met me in person got quite a chuckle out of that one lady's post about me being a man cross-dresser with a D bra size or whatever. lol
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Message 156419 (In Reply to Message 155914)
Posted by Silverthorne
on Jul 17, 2005 03:18 AM | Also by Silverthorne
| Gender: Male,
Age Bracket: N/A,
State: Arizona,
Country: United States |
I believe it should be confidential as far as the names go. I posted a few weeks ago something sent to me by someone that I mentioned was a PM but left anonymous. I don't believe in sharing names but content may be important.
Silverthorne
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Message 156536 (In Reply to Message 156419)
Private means private
Posted by newmind6
on Jul 18, 2005 12:22 AM | Also by newmind6
| Gender: Male,
Age Bracket: N/A,
State: Pennsylvania,
Country: United States |
A PM is just that a private communication. I have been PM’d and asked if my posts could be used at a forum on sex offenders. I agreed without hesitation. But what was important was that I was asked. If the content of a private message is to be used in the open forum then permission should be obtained to do so. If that person declines then perhaps a paraphrasing could be used. But even that must be thought out.
Silverthorne and others here pour their hearts out and express thoughts, desires and feelings that surely would not be expressed if this were a face-to-face meeting. The same happens in the venue of the private message. Let’s keep it confidential and private. Here we have identities that represent us in the electronic community. A private communiqué is a tool used by that identity to communicate a thought or deep feeling directly to the receiver. Agree or disagree with the message, it is still private.
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Thread
155914, steve, Jul 12, 2005 03:16 PM
155918, steve, Jul 12, 2005 03:19 PM [The recent post in question]
156118, Scaye, Jul 14, 2005 04:49 AM
156163, 1dadof5, Jul 14, 2005 03:54 PM [steve and others]
156190, dp1, Jul 15, 2005 12:35 AM [Dad]
156207, dp1, Jul 15, 2005 02:29 AM
156419, Silverthorne, Jul 17, 2005 03:18 AM
156536, newmind6, Jul 18, 2005 12:22 AM [Private means private]
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