Sex Offender Registries, Sex Offenders Search, News, Info and Discussion

Top Posters Since October 2003
dp1	4000+
orolan	4000+
Navigatr1	2500+
Silvert...	2500+
1dadof5	2500+
Valerie	2000+
steve	1500+
victori...	1000+
myoung	1000+
rabbitr...	750+
HPierce	750+
poetsdr...	750+
Renunci...	750+
lj	750+
fallenone	500+
DoTheCr...	500+
marta	500+
momhelp...	500+
prozac	500+
rebel51	500+
PVulcan	250+
anti	250+
rodsmith	250+
LockEmUp	250+
Quest	250+
artie	250+
KK	250+
LostTime	250+
TGoodman	250+
amberleaf	250+
deadmom...	250+
brennus	100+
scarlett	100+
mousein...	100+
thepar	100+
assumpt...	100+
lildrafire	100+
JakeLF	100+
MrTruth	100+
june5	100+

Newest Users
Registered within the last 72 hours.
anitatcandia
glassmarble
hud123
khf333
lisala33
marcorl
rdehne
vanessa
zxcvbnm

Forum: The Other Side

Thread (Discussion): My Niece

Switch to Flat View

In order to post a message to a new thread or reply to existing messages you must be logged in. If you'd like to post messages please login or register as a new user.

Message 136950 (In Reply to Message 136936)
oops, freudian slip

Posted by deadmomwalking on Jul 05, 2004 07:19 PM | Also by deadmomwalking

Gender: Female, Age Bracket: 50 - 59, State: N/A, Country: Canada

I meant mother of victim, not victim of mother, although I am sure some of my daughter's therapist's might agree with the first assessment. Perhaps it was my guilt showing through.

See an abbreviation or acronym, but don't know what it stands for? Consult the Glossary.

Switch to Flat View

Message 136936

Posted by deadmomwalking on Jul 05, 2004 09:18 AM | Also by deadmomwalking

Gender: Female, Age Bracket: 50 - 59, State: N/A, Country: Canada

Well, that is done anyway.  I know it was a painful meeting but it was a very productive one - for both you and your niece.  You had the opportunity to apologize but also to hear what the effect of your actions was on your niece.  I remember that prior to the meeting you seemed to be expressing the hope that you niece might still remember you fondly, that perhaps you hadn't done any real lasting harm.  Now you know this is not the case.  It almost never is in cases of child abuse and that knowledge should help to keep you from reoffending.

Victims usually say the two questions they want answered are "Why" and Why me?"
Sometimes, as in my daughter's case, they think there is something supernaturally bad  about them, that they have somehow brought these horrible things upon themselves, even though they don't know why.  What your niece now, hopefully, understands it that she had nothing to do with it, that she is no more responsible for her abuse than she would be for being struck by lightning.

From the victim of a mother I want to thank you heartily for posting your experiences.  Your honesty and soul-searching has lifted a burden of sorts for me.  It is what I wished that my daughter's abuser could find the courage and moral rectitude to do.

I had a talk with the minister of the church I have been attending and she said an interesting thing.  She said that we all "sin" and commit evil acts at times; that this is human.  We start losing our humanity when we begin rationalizing and making excuses for our sins, rather than admitting and atoning for them and that we cross over into evil when we can no longer see that what we are doing is wrong.

I am glad you are crossing back.

Thread

136798, JakeLF, Jul 01, 2004 11:28 PM [Meeting with her for the first time....]
      136827, Silverthorne, Jul 02, 2004 06:00 AM [Sad]
            136842, JakeLF, Jul 03, 2004 12:43 AM [The Day After]
                  136844, dp1, Jul 03, 2004 03:58 AM [Jake]
      136830, dp1, Jul 02, 2004 01:47 PM [Jake]
      136835, fallenone, Jul 02, 2004 05:00 PM
      136936, deadmomwalking, Jul 05, 2004 09:18 AM
            136950, deadmomwalking, Jul 05, 2004 07:19 PM [oops, freudian slip]
            136956, dp1, Jul 05, 2004 09:34 PM [DMW]
      137039, dp1, Jul 07, 2004 02:56 PM [Jake]

Forum Home | Top of Thread

Tell a Friend about this page.

Sex Offender Registries, Sex Offenders Search, News, Info and Discussion

Forum: The Other SideThread (Discussion): My Niece

Message 136950 (In Reply to Message 136936)oops, freudian slip

Message 136936

Thread

Forum: The Other Side

Thread (Discussion): My Niece

Message 136950 (In Reply to Message 136936)
oops, freudian slip