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Forum: The Other Side

Thread (Discussion): therapy alone?

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Message 136917 (In Reply to Message 136910)
Thankyou for your questions


Posted by assumption18 on Jul 04, 2004 10:53 PM | Also by assumption18
Gender: Male, Age Bracket: 21 - 29, State: District of Columbia, Country: United States
and for your response.


I am assuming you were never arrested for a sex offense, am I correct in thinking that?

The reason I ask is because some people realize their problems are out of control after they are booked in the county jail

You would be correct. I am so glad of this too.

The latter is the case, simply because the "support network" for this is hard to find, and not exactly condoned by society. "Legal pedophilia" ie, Living as a pedophile Legally, is generally either frowned upon as "a lie" or seen in utter contempt..


I'd be interested in knowing exactly how, why or when you decided things were out of control

Well, i see *now* there are two paths a "pedophile" (though i use that word begrudgingly as it is used interchangably with even situational molesters, and also with so many other things) can take. By pedophile here, I mean someone who is sexually attracted to children..

One of the paths, leads from focusing on the sexual side, this usually begins with finding pictures of nudes, soft/core, and progresses onto harder and harder materials in order to achieve the desired sexual gratification. Depending on the circumstances and also the mental state of the person, they may be able to live like this without offending against an actual child, if they were put into a compromising situation though, their instinct would no doubt be very hard to deny, and they would be constantly tortured internally with this desire for what they cannot have, a vicious cycle.

The second path, leads much more to viewing the attraction as much more than just sexual. Letting yourself become more emotionally attracted, physically, romantically, and letting your desire that once was confined to sexual attraction, fill out into the other areas. Due to the taboos in society, the reason this is less often done, is because people are almost shephered that if they like "kids", then they are hopeless causes who need constant help. When, this, if sorted out properly, can be anything but.
In this "path", the pedophile may have contacts, also other pedophiles, and even children, but the contacts will not be for sexual gratification, and will be much more legal, and also uplifting. They may discuss family matters, etc, actually look to each other for help regarding certain matters, etc.

The two paths slowly diverge, the first, most likely commiting an offence. The second, having a family and being a loving caring dad, with a "secret", and will not share this with anyone but his friends, due to the misperception.

I take the second path, call it the romantic path, or something I am not sure, all I know it that, by channeling my desire for little girls into more legal and proper methods, It no longer creates a vacuum inside me which only lust could try to fill. It makes me more stable, and stability is good when it come to "temptation". I have been in situations where I could have taken advantage, much to my sexual gratification, but I choose not, because, as another component to me, it would actually make me feel Bad to do something that would harm the little girl. I see this as yet another positive, as I know I would never (sober, and I do not drink alcohol) commit an offence.

I hope i have not gone off the plot too much, as I do rant at times :)

Once I got into this mindset, much as the path 1 mindset would do, it almost restructures your way of thinking, which is positive, as it is almost as if I see ltitle gils in a new light, in a good light. Let me explain what I am trying to say:

When I see a woman, if they are showing a lot of skin, are particular attractive, etc, I can get sexually attracted to them, although out of respect I do not dwell on it.

When I see a Little Girl, it is as if My heart latches onto them, rather than my reproductive system, and I feel that rather than making up some scheme to get them into bed, Id have to care for them, and want to be there by their side, spend time with, and comfort, etc, all loving, fatherly things (to a degree). Obviously, as you can guess, many parents are skeptical of this, but I have nothing to hide, and obviously their child's safety is paramount, so I agree with whatever they say.


You also mentioned that you do not agree with sex outside of marriage. Is it safe to assume you are married?
I am not currently married, but hope to one day. I am not sexually active with anyone, but I do masturbate (sorry if this is a little too graphic, I am merely being honest).

Honestly, sex I do not see as the be all and end all of my life. I need to keep it in check, always, but it is never any longer a factor I have to really consider with fear.


In your opinion, why do you think some pedophiles think they can not maintain a healthy relationship with an adult (male or female)?

I believe there are pedophiles who are just Not attracted to adults. Just as there are adults who are not attracted to children. It would make sense with the diversity of the human population.
For those, I would say it is harder, but it is still not impossible to live without offending. Fantasy I would say, could play a big part in this, and that is why, I would support the use of Fantasy, as long as it is taken as such and is not used to rationalise any real situation. I honestly cannot speak as someone in that situation, and so, I wont.

But to those who I can speak of, I hope, that I can some how, pass on anything I can, to show people how to live without offending, as a pedophile.

I classify myself best as a Girl Lover. I Love Little Girls, Sexuality is a minor (no pun intended) component of this entire area. And that is where I will rest my pen for now.

Sorry for the length of this post.

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Message 136910
A18


Posted by dp1 on Jul 04, 2004 08:26 PM | Also by dp1
Gender: Female, Age Bracket: N/A, State: Florida, Country: United States

Thread


136784, fallenone, Jul 01, 2004 04:10 PM [A most dangerous game]
      136847, dp1, Jul 03, 2004 04:39 AM
            136860, Navigatr1, Jul 03, 2004 02:35 PM
                  136872, fallenone, Jul 03, 2004 07:14 PM [The better way is not the easier way]
                        136878, dp1, Jul 04, 2004 02:26 AM [F1]
                  136893, dp1, Jul 04, 2004 11:45 AM
                        136915, Silverthorne, Jul 04, 2004 09:30 PM [Problem is....]
                              136920, dp1, Jul 04, 2004 11:53 PM [Silver]
                                    137087, myoung, Jul 08, 2004 02:57 PM [dp1]
                        137002, fallenone, Jul 06, 2004 10:49 PM
                              137019, dp1, Jul 07, 2004 03:50 AM
                                    137092, fallenone, Jul 08, 2004 07:12 PM
                                          137105, dp1, Jul 09, 2004 02:37 AM [Generalizing]
                                                137150, fallenone, Jul 09, 2004 04:45 PM
                                                      137194, dp1, Jul 10, 2004 04:44 AM [F1]
                                                            137972, fallenone, Jul 26, 2004 07:07 PM [You just don't g...]
                                                                  137978, dp1, Jul 26, 2004 08:13 PM
                                                                        138085, fallenone, Jul 28, 2004 05:20 PM
                  136894, dp1, Jul 04, 2004 11:51 AM
                        136916, Silverthorne, Jul 04, 2004 09:35 PM [Not entirely true]
                              136919, dp1, Jul 04, 2004 11:49 PM [Silver]
                                    136928, Silverthorne, Jul 05, 2004 02:10 AM [Not the same]
                                          136929, Silverthorne, Jul 05, 2004 02:18 AM [MLK lesson here]
                                          136931, dp1, Jul 05, 2004 03:57 AM [Silver]
                                                136979, Silverthorne, Jul 06, 2004 06:49 AM
                                                      136986, dp1, Jul 06, 2004 10:45 AM [OK]
                                                            136992, Silverthorne, Jul 06, 2004 06:14 PM [Well....]
                                                                  137003, dp1, Jul 06, 2004 10:54 PM [Silver]
                                                                        137023, Silverthorne, Jul 07, 2004 07:22 AM [DP1]
                        137085, Navigatr1, Jul 08, 2004 02:56 PM [Isolation]
      136875, assumption18, Jul 03, 2004 09:50 PM [It starts with change.]
            136882, Silverthorne, Jul 04, 2004 03:44 AM [About FreeSpirits]
                  136883, myoung, Jul 04, 2004 04:06 AM [okay...thanks silver]
                  136888, dp1, Jul 04, 2004 04:38 AM
            136889, steve, Jul 04, 2004 05:15 AM
                  136901, assumption18, Jul 04, 2004 04:21 PM [More about me]
                        136910, dp1, Jul 04, 2004 08:26 PM [A18]
                              136917, assumption18, Jul 04, 2004 10:53 PM [Thankyou for your questions]
                                    136925, Silverthorne, Jul 05, 2004 01:59 AM [Assumption]
                                          136932, dp1, Jul 05, 2004 04:11 AM [A18]
                                                136941, assumption18, Jul 05, 2004 01:12 PM [About Love]
                                                      136943, dp1, Jul 05, 2004 03:06 PM [A18]
                                                            136944, assumption18, Jul 05, 2004 03:42 PM [I see what yo...]
                                                                  136951, dp1, Jul 05, 2004 07:23 PM
                                                                        136955, assumption18, Jul 05, 2004 09:28 PM [My reply]
                                                                              136958, steve, Jul 05, 2004 10:02 PM
                                                                              136959, dp1, Jul 05, 2004 10:09 PM [Will Move th...]
                                                            136945, assumption18, Jul 05, 2004 04:35 PM [Second reply...]
                                                                  136952, dp1, Jul 05, 2004 07:36 PM
                                                136993, Silverthorne, Jul 06, 2004 06:17 PM ["Love" and boylovers]
                                                      136994, Silverthorne, Jul 06, 2004 06:20 PM [DP1]
                                          136940, assumption18, Jul 05, 2004 01:05 PM [Where the line is drawn]
                                                136954, dp1, Jul 05, 2004 07:54 PM [Drawing Lines]
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