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Forum: The Other Side

Thread (Discussion): Struggling Part 2

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Message 136768 (In Reply to Message 136765)
Jake

Posted by dp1 on Jul 01, 2004 04:00 AM | Also by dp1

Gender: Female, Age Bracket: N/A, State: Florida, Country: United States

I'd like to ask some questions for clarification. You mentioned that your therapist does not think you are an exclusive pedophile which you don't agree with. Does your therapist mean that you can also have a sexually gratifying relationship with an adult?

You also question about being a pedophile who has never acted out. Silverthorne is a regular poster on this board who's been diagnosed with pedophilia and states that he's never acted on his desires, although he's had some close calls according to some of his posts. Just as a side note, Silverthorne has not posted much lately becuase of his recent cancer treatments, although within the next few weeks he should be done with his chemo. The reason I am mentioning this is because he's awesome. He's very supportive and has been in volunteer therapy for years. He has quite a story to tell. He's also fun to chat with:-) I think you guys will hit it off....just give him a few weeks to recover. He can tell you more about pedophilia then you'll ever want to know. He's also doing some graduate work in psychology and hopes to treat adult sex offenders down the road. I think Silverthorne is an excellent role model for pedophiles and most certainly would be posting to you more often right now if it weren't for his health problems.

I have a question for you. I also asked Silverthorne the same thing. While I understand we all have sexual preferences, what is stopping you from having sex with adults? Do you prefer males or females or both? Were all your victims about the same age and sex or is there a variety?

I am heterosexual 100%. I don't find women attractive AT ALL. However, in DP1's fantasy world if they outlawed sex with men and sex with children remained illegal, I suppose I'd have to try women. Quite honestly the thought is repulsive to me, but if I had a choice of breaking the law, satisfying myself for the rest of my life or women, I suppose I'd force myself to try it.(Please don't ask me how much I'd have to drink and what I'd have to smoke to do this) Do you know what I mean?

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Message 136765
Seeking Help...

Posted by JakeLF on Jul 01, 2004 12:42 AM | Also by JakeLF

Gender: N/A, Age Bracket: N/A, State: N/A, Country: United States

As I said in my prior struggling post I have been struggling with my desires and feelings towards children. I am not like most SO where I don't have an attraction to women or even men, my whole life I have always been drawn to children. I am a pedophile 100%, no ifs or ands about it. In the past I made the fact that I was a pedophile a green light for me to molest children. I don't want that to be the green light anymore and it hasn't been for some time. Even though I am attracted to children I have kept my feelings for children at bay and in fantasies and not reality.

I have met with my therapist almost daily and have told him there are times where I come close but do not do it because I know how it would hurt a child and it would hurt me by relapsing into my old pattern of abuse and I do not want to go there. Yes its extremely hard to go places where children are but I cope and overcome by trying to think of something else or leave when I start thinking about children.

I don't have any violent thoughts about children, I have more violent thoughts about what I would do to myself if I ever acted out sexual with a child again. I want to prevent that and by coming here and getting support and people accepting me even though what I did to my niece is great, its great to have people that can steer me clear from relapsing into the behavior I was once involved in.

I appreciate the few people that said that I should go to a religious place and find sanction there, I really don't see that happening anytime soon. God must think people like me are disgusting and trash. I have violated children's trust and violated them sexually, I don't think god has any room for a sinner like me. Also its nice going to a therapist to discuss my problems, but he says that I am not an exclusive pedophile which I really don't agree with. I think that you can be a pedophile and never act out your desires, am I wrong in this thinking?

Thread

136765, JakeLF, Jul 01, 2004 12:42 AM [Seeking Help...]
      136768, dp1, Jul 01, 2004 04:00 AM [Jake]
            136828, Silverthorne, Jul 02, 2004 06:08 AM [Thanks DP1- Jake]
            137236, WalkingTheLine, Jul 10, 2004 11:19 PM
                  137264, dp1, Jul 11, 2004 04:03 AM [WTL]
                        137288, WalkingTheLine, Jul 11, 2004 11:45 PM
      136776, myoung, Jul 01, 2004 01:06 PM [Jake jake jake]
      136782, fallenone, Jul 01, 2004 03:34 PM
      137237, WalkingTheLine, Jul 10, 2004 11:37 PM

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Sex Offender Registries, Sex Offenders Search, News, Info and Discussion

Forum: The Other SideThread (Discussion): Struggling Part 2

Message 136768 (In Reply to Message 136765)Jake

Message 136765Seeking Help...

Thread

Forum: The Other Side

Thread (Discussion): Struggling Part 2

Message 136768 (In Reply to Message 136765)
Jake

Message 136765
Seeking Help...