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Forum: The Other Side

Thread (Discussion): Struggling

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Message 136873 (In Reply to Message 136854)
You're trying too hard

Posted by fallenone on Jul 03, 2004 07:45 PM | Also by fallenone

Gender: N/A, Age Bracket: N/A, State: Ohio, Country: United States

Just because someone is put in a position and works there does not necessarily mean that person has the capability to fully handle the job. There are two people working with me now who are ill suited to do the job but they are still there. And i suppose you didn't go to college or you'd know almost evey college in the country makes you intern for most degrees. What makes you think I'm unqualified to know what I'm talking about? Just because I haven't been on official DOJ payrolls? I have worked with SOs before and during prison thank you very much.

You can call my statements "backpeddling" if you so desire. Being an average human with a short time schedule I had only a few minutes to type my thoughts before rushing on to work and as such I did not have time to say all I needed to say on the subject. My time here is getting rather limited between my job, school and SOFIA. Next time I will wait until I have time to explain fully any comments I make but I back up what I say and that's that.

Actually you do "fit the mold." You have stated you are in favor of most limits on the SOs unless they cause more work for you. You had stated to me in a discussion regarding jobs SOs do not work well with people (a generalization), you are in favor of sanctions against those who could not find housing for circumstances beyond their control (don't forget that's why I started posting here), and you believe all SOs are alike and there's no cure. And after reading so much of your posts I also realize your knowledge in many places is quite inadequate. My only disappointment in regards to you comes from the latter. You've shown me as one to not get the whole story before rebuttals, one not detail-oriented. Getting the details is important but you prefer generalizations because it is easier to lump us all together as equally bad. So even if you aren't as bad in your eyes as some of the others you still are in the dark. I see also someonme has to draw your ire to get you to stand up for anything. To me you tend to contradict yourself a great deal. I don't need to meet you in public to ascertain your ability to do your job. Your words speak plenty.

You are still offended I question your abilities to do your job. Whatever. If you said I was unqualified to disect the atom I'd not be offended though I have blown a few things up. I can admit where I'm Ignorant. If you can't that's on you. The PM will come next week, by the way. It's 2:45 and I gotta go to work. The Library's closed till the 6th so you'll just have to wait.

The Fallen One

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Message 136854
F1

Posted by dp1 on Jul 03, 2004 11:17 AM | Also by dp1

Gender: Female, Age Bracket: N/A, State: Florida, Country: United States

<blockquote>The therapy is not the issue because by his own admission Jake is ALREADY in therapy. Nowhere did I say for him to quit. Your "reading between the lines" can thus be seen as your own personal bias against any suggestion beyond the feeble system now in place.</blockquote>

This is the second time I’ve quoted YOUR words. Please advise which lines I am reading BETWEEN.

<blockquote>Therapy only goes so far and is ineffective for a couple of reasons the main one being it doesn't do anything to relieve isolationism or a host of other things.</blockquote>

It appears to me I was very clear that therapy was the issue and you clearly stated it was ineffective. I see you’ve done some back peddling so obviously you don’t think therapy really is ineffective you just can’t admit I gotcha.

<blockquote> You think all someone has to do is go to therapy and everything will be alright. You are the one with the flawed thinking.</blockquote>

Where in the world did you come up with this? Did you forget I see SO’s go to jail every single day, even SO’s in treatment? I never said everything would be all right and never will. You must have me mistaken for someone else.

<blockquote> As far as these studies go, those people it has helped were not isolated, as you'd like.</blockquote>

Once again, you must have my identity confused. I never once said I would like to see SO’s isolated nor do I even hint at the mere thought. I have on several occasions spoken out against clustering, zip codes and bus stop laws. Do my real views not fit the typical LE we all love to hate? Am I not the "establishment" SO's love to slam? Sorry, I disappoint you and don’t fit the mold.

<blockquote>You are trying to play the victim role. You're no victim so get real.</blockquote>

Please enlighten all of us where this came from. I don’t recall ever being molested as a child. Do I suffer from a suppressed memory that I can’t remember but only post about in my sleep? Considering the amount of posts I post directly to SO’s vs. the victims I can’t even imagine how I might have remotely given that impression.

F1,  pick your battles wisely. Look over the history of posts. You will find I have more supportive posts directed towards the SO’s than any SO or victim combined. I have on many occasions spoken out in favor of SO’s with the victims. Hmmm. So if I haven’t been molested and support SO’s, what’s the I am trying to play the victim role thing about? Are you insulted that I post to the victim’s board?

<blockquote> Apparently any opinion not in tune with yours is irrational or "out of control." Whatever. If you feel intimidated by someone not afraid to confront you and the issues then that's your own fault because that is not my intent.</blockquote>

Once again you’re not talking about reality. I almost always join threads and post for the sole purpose of debate.  Just ask Silverthorne or Orolan. There’s no need in the middle of a debate to make judgments about my job performance (which by the way for the benefit of the readers….this person never even met me or anyone I’ve ever worked with nor has he ever worked in the field of law enforcement). That makes as much sense as comments I remember that used to come from another angry SO who used to talk about PO’s GPAs as if he went to college with me. Just try and stick to the issue and not let the conversations get out of control. That’s all I ask. If the issue is whether or not therapy is effective then let’s not talk about my GPA, my job performance, your mother, my mother, or your X-girlfriend’s shoe size. Keep the posts controlled by not engaging in personal attacks where they don’t belong.

<blockquote> . I have no personal feelings regarding you. That's irrelevent. If you feel it's personal, then perhaps you're merely feling the conviction of your own fallacious and biased thoughts.</blockquote>

Yes you do and quit lying about it. You have allowed your personal feelings about me get in the way of debates. For example,

<blockquote>The longer I involve myself here DP the less respect I have for you and the more I have come to believe you are ill qualified to be in your position. And I make no apologies for saying it.</blockquote>

This statement had no bearing on the issue I raised about therapy being effective. I have no problems with your feelings since you are as human as I. But, don’t flat out lie and pretend your posts don’t personally attack. That is not accurate. If there’s something bothering you personally about me and it is frustrating you to this level then why don’t you just PM me and tell me off. Then let’s get back to business. I have no doubt what I represent bothers you. You address posts to me that sound like your talking to the "establishment" by venting about things I never even spoke about. You have on more than one occasion talked about studying criminal justice and not being able to work in the field because of your background. There really must be some resentment there. I understand completely. Don’t let your frustrations eat you up. Get over it F1. Accept I am not the "establishment" and a human being just like you that makes mistakes, has feelings and compassion for SO.

Likewise. I am not here for you either. However, I will assume you are human and treat you as such. My objections to your posts are the insults and digs which divide not only “us” but the overall relationship between the SO’s and non-SO’s. There is no question I have been very supportive towards most of the SO’s. And maybe I have not been as supportive to you as you would like. I somehow suspect that is true because more than once you’ve brought up how I didn’t remember a certain detail about your case which would suggest you are aware I have not paid too much attention to you. Well maybe it’s time we get to know each other a little better, pay attention to each other, accept our differences and move forward.

P.S.

Let me come right out say something not only for your benefit but for others reading this. I know it bothers you that I have evaded certain issues. Other people have not mentioned it probably because they've been here longer and figured out my MO so to speak. I have on several occassions refused to answer certain questions on a public forum when I know for a fact will encite SO. I have no problems with PMs and never have. I have on many occassions posted things myself that caused debates or fights. But, I have seen too many debates turn to nothing more than mean, back biting sessions that weren't theraputic for anyone. If I feel a situation like that is coming on I will stop and avoid the situation. You seem to take offense to that. It's the only way I have found to stop or control an out of control situation on the forum. F1, you may not have been here long enough to appreciate what I am saying. There used to be some very nasty posters on this forum a long time ago. Things have turned around 100%.  Some of us long time reguler posters here have worked hard at eliminating the intense flame throwing posts that used to be common place around here. If you don't believe me just ask Silverthorne, Orolan or Steve.

Thread

136445, JakeLF, Jun 23, 2004 06:40 AM [Its really hard]
      136466, deadmomwalking, Jun 23, 2004 07:29 PM
            136477, myoung, Jun 24, 2004 01:36 AM [it saddens me]
            136528, JakeLF, Jun 25, 2004 04:29 AM [Thanks for the response]
                  136551, myoung, Jun 25, 2004 04:10 PM [Jake]
                  136558, dp1, Jun 25, 2004 11:22 PM [Jake]
      136508, dp1, Jun 24, 2004 01:31 PM
            136688, fallenone, Jun 28, 2004 07:34 PM [Therapy doesn't cut it.]
                  136701, dp1, Jun 29, 2004 02:52 AM [Listen to What you're Saying]
                        136703, steve, Jun 29, 2004 03:17 AM
                              136722, fallenone, Jun 29, 2004 05:10 PM [An unDePendable assessment]
                                    136725, dp1, Jun 29, 2004 06:29 PM [Beautiful]
                                          136728, dp1, Jun 29, 2004 06:49 PM [Friendly Suggestion]
                                                136781, fallenone, Jul 01, 2004 03:21 PM [Get over yourself]
                                          136792, fallenone, Jul 01, 2004 06:27 PM
                                                136854, dp1, Jul 03, 2004 11:17 AM [F1]
                                                      136873, fallenone, Jul 03, 2004 07:45 PM [You're trying too hard]
                                                            136887, dp1, Jul 04, 2004 04:31 AM [F1]
                                                                  137004, fallenone, Jul 06, 2004 11:42 PM [reforming the...]
                                    136739, myoung, Jun 29, 2004 08:41 PM [F1]
                                          136740, steve, Jun 29, 2004 09:16 PM
                                          136742, dp1, Jun 29, 2004 11:49 PM [MYoung]
                                                136747, myoung, Jun 30, 2004 03:53 AM [absolutely dp1]
                                                      136751, dp1, Jun 30, 2004 04:57 AM [MYoung]
                                                            136775, myoung, Jul 01, 2004 12:53 PM [uh huh]
                                          136783, fallenone, Jul 01, 2004 03:54 PM [Et tu, brute?]
      136576, tryingtosurvive, Jun 26, 2004 01:25 PM [Cheer up Mate]
            136581, deadmomwalking, Jun 26, 2004 05:28 PM [JAKE]
                  136620, tryingtosurvive, Jun 27, 2004 01:10 PM [Amen to DMW with some reservations.]
                        136634, dp1, Jun 27, 2004 09:36 PM [TTS]
      136817, nolongerhomocidal, Jul 02, 2004 04:04 AM [what about just talking to your PO]
            136831, dp1, Jul 02, 2004 02:00 PM [NLH]

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Sex Offender Registries, Sex Offenders Search, News, Info and Discussion

Forum: The Other SideThread (Discussion): Struggling

Message 136873 (In Reply to Message 136854)You're trying too hard

Message 136854F1

Thread

Forum: The Other Side

Thread (Discussion): Struggling

Message 136873 (In Reply to Message 136854)
You're trying too hard

Message 136854
F1