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Forum: The Other Side

Thread (Discussion): Struggling

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Message 136751 (In Reply to Message 136747)
MYoung

Posted by dp1 on Jun 30, 2004 04:57 AM | Also by dp1

Gender: Female, Age Bracket: N/A, State: Florida, Country: United States

You are bringing out some excellent points. A common thing that happens with pedophles I've noticed is that they are scared to death to tell their therapist they have slipped. They will inevitably tell me they are having deviant thoughts before they tell their therapist. They do this because they know I won't yell at them or threaten them in any way, nor would I be in the least bit surprised or disappointed. Their therapist on the other hand would give them hell. For this reason, I always make a point to meet with my therapists at least once a month. As soon as the SO's realize there are no secrets they start working on their stuff.

The interesting thing I've learned about chatting and posting is that you can say what you want when you want and not have to take full responsibility for your actions. Cyberspace is fun, but it's not real. Unfortunately, real people are posting with real life problems that we have little control over since we don't ever know who they are. The least we can all do is not to play into their fantasy and slap a few folks with some reality. Know what I mean?

See an abbreviation or acronym, but don't know what it stands for? Consult the Glossary.

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Message 136747
absolutely dp1

Posted by myoung on Jun 30, 2004 03:53 AM | Also by myoung

Gender: N/A, Age Bracket: N/A, State: Pennsylvania, Country: United States

You took the words right out of my geeky mouth...lol.  Resistant to change is what I was trying to get at I think but the words weren't coming.  Therapy is a lot of work and if you aren't willing to work, you will not do well.  It's not the therapy that failed you, it's you who failed in therapy.  I have been in therapy since long before my daughter was molested.  Geez, it's been nearly 10 years I think.  I use biofeedback, accupuncture, meditation, yoga, and whatever other methods my therapists feels will help.  We do have venting sessions but he applies accupuncture while I am doing that.  It helps me relax and keep my thoughts straight.  But, I have to go home and actually apply all of these methods.  Unlike my sister who is still rather unwell and has been in therapy longer than I.  She doesn't do the work and she doesn't apply the principles.  That is so key to recovery.  I nearly burst into tears when my father told me that all of the biofeedback tapes she has from therapy are still unopened.  He also informed me that instead of actually doing the yoga exercises and meditation, she watches the cd but never does it.  Funny, she doesn't do the work and I've noticed her slipping back into her old patterns and ways of thinking as well.  She and I are a good experiment to see if these things really work.  We had and have similar issues but one of us is working hard at it and the other is not.  Which do you think will slip back first?? Hmmmmmmm

Thread

136445, JakeLF, Jun 23, 2004 06:40 AM [Its really hard]
      136466, deadmomwalking, Jun 23, 2004 07:29 PM
            136477, myoung, Jun 24, 2004 01:36 AM [it saddens me]
            136528, JakeLF, Jun 25, 2004 04:29 AM [Thanks for the response]
                  136551, myoung, Jun 25, 2004 04:10 PM [Jake]
                  136558, dp1, Jun 25, 2004 11:22 PM [Jake]
      136508, dp1, Jun 24, 2004 01:31 PM
            136688, fallenone, Jun 28, 2004 07:34 PM [Therapy doesn't cut it.]
                  136701, dp1, Jun 29, 2004 02:52 AM [Listen to What you're Saying]
                        136703, steve, Jun 29, 2004 03:17 AM
                              136722, fallenone, Jun 29, 2004 05:10 PM [An unDePendable assessment]
                                    136725, dp1, Jun 29, 2004 06:29 PM [Beautiful]
                                          136728, dp1, Jun 29, 2004 06:49 PM [Friendly Suggestion]
                                                136781, fallenone, Jul 01, 2004 03:21 PM [Get over yourself]
                                          136792, fallenone, Jul 01, 2004 06:27 PM
                                                136854, dp1, Jul 03, 2004 11:17 AM [F1]
                                                      136873, fallenone, Jul 03, 2004 07:45 PM [You're trying too hard]
                                                            136887, dp1, Jul 04, 2004 04:31 AM [F1]
                                                                  137004, fallenone, Jul 06, 2004 11:42 PM [reforming the...]
                                    136739, myoung, Jun 29, 2004 08:41 PM [F1]
                                          136740, steve, Jun 29, 2004 09:16 PM
                                          136742, dp1, Jun 29, 2004 11:49 PM [MYoung]
                                                136747, myoung, Jun 30, 2004 03:53 AM [absolutely dp1]
                                                      136751, dp1, Jun 30, 2004 04:57 AM [MYoung]
                                                            136775, myoung, Jul 01, 2004 12:53 PM [uh huh]
                                          136783, fallenone, Jul 01, 2004 03:54 PM [Et tu, brute?]
      136576, tryingtosurvive, Jun 26, 2004 01:25 PM [Cheer up Mate]
            136581, deadmomwalking, Jun 26, 2004 05:28 PM [JAKE]
                  136620, tryingtosurvive, Jun 27, 2004 01:10 PM [Amen to DMW with some reservations.]
                        136634, dp1, Jun 27, 2004 09:36 PM [TTS]
      136817, nolongerhomocidal, Jul 02, 2004 04:04 AM [what about just talking to your PO]
            136831, dp1, Jul 02, 2004 02:00 PM [NLH]

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Sex Offender Registries, Sex Offenders Search, News, Info and Discussion

Forum: The Other SideThread (Discussion): Struggling

Message 136751 (In Reply to Message 136747)MYoung

Message 136747absolutely dp1

Thread

Forum: The Other Side

Thread (Discussion): Struggling

Message 136751 (In Reply to Message 136747)
MYoung

Message 136747
absolutely dp1