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Forum: The Other Side
Thread (Discussion): Mounting Frustration
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Message 135979
How much can one man take?
Posted by fallenone
on Jun 13, 2004 07:24 PM | Also by fallenone
| Gender: N/A,
Age Bracket: N/A,
State: Ohio,
Country: United States |
All my life I have wanted only two things--
1. To be truly loved by someone
2. To find my purpose in life.
Well I've certainly given up on #1. So that leaves #2. I believe my purpose in life involves my dilemma. Now I want to help sex offenders because I believe that humans CAN change. If not than why bother changing I should just accept this label and just destroy as many lives as possible since that is what is expected of me. Judging by my temperment as of late I guess you can tell I am becoming quite disenchanted with this problem. It feels too big and too much for any one person to handle, especially one who suffers as much mental illness as I. Everything is hitting me all at once-- my girlfriend dumped me, I've been taken advantage of by someone claiming to want to be with me (not my ex, a different person), and I've been hit with a barrage of personal problems too numerous to discuss. I've been breaking my own rules by letting the utter hatred and disdain I get for being an SO here at this site get to me as well. This has been the only place I have felt so welcome yet so unwelcome at the same time. I am admittedly buckling under the pressure of the totality of my personal circumstances. Even the strongest of the all fall. Well I suppose some of you people are thinking "oh no now he's gonna go find some 11 year old to play with." Well you're wrong. I'm inclined to believe as the ancient Cathars do-- that sex is evil and that it should strongly discouraged. as for me I am trying to accept my personal destiny. I was born into this world alone, I will never be with anyone in my life and I am destined to die alone. My only reason for not ending my life now is because my enemies rejoice. So I blade to suffice. At least the only person I'm messing up is myself. But I'm not suffering enough to some people. What do you want from me?!? To just crawl up under some rock and die? I can't understand the amount of hatred some of you possess, nor can I understand love. What is love for that matter? How can I understand familial bond? I have only myself. I suppose you can call this my nervous breakdown...........
The Fallen One
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Thread
135979, fallenone, Jun 13, 2004 07:24 PM [How much can one man take?]
135984, pegasus, Jun 13, 2004 08:12 PM [Remember]
136004, dp1, Jun 14, 2004 02:16 AM [F1]
136011, dp1, Jun 14, 2004 04:46 AM [F1]
136016, deadmomwalking, Jun 14, 2004 09:30 AM [fallenone - hold on to the good]
136017, Rejected
136031, fallenone, Jun 14, 2004 06:03 PM [6/14--reply to all]
136366, wifey, Jun 21, 2004 05:49 PM [Keep your head up]
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