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Forum: Victims and Survivors Corner

Thread (Discussion): Where's the Victims?

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Message 174296 (In Reply to Message 174161)
perhaps how you respond

Posted by cass117 on Mar 04, 2006 04:49 PM | Also by cass117

Gender: Female, Age Bracket: 21 - 29, State: North Carolina, Country: United States

hi guys i am not here to argue or anything .for many years it was my sexual abuse that was in the fore front of my marriage ,noone ever thinks this could happen to you and it was to my utter disgust when i came here that me being a victim was disgarded due to my husband being an offender.never in my posts will you see me making excuses for my husband as i was the one who put him away,however every case is different .i thought this forum could give me insight to being a victim and support from other victims also support and advice on the road i am now travelling,that has not been the case.i feel some people on this side like to judge to much and that is the last thing a victim needs .i cried for a day when someone made referance to me not reporting my brother ,feeling the old feelings that i should have done more ,now i am just mad .take me being the wife of an offender out this situation ,i try very hard when in the victims forum not to belittle anyones thoughts or feelings perhaps the lack of empathy on certain peoples parts contribute to there being no victims .i was a looker for a long time and if i were looking now i wouldn't come here. as a victim of sexual abuse and as a wife of an offender i wont post here again b/c as far as some of you are concerned it is the latter that prevents me from being able to give supportive advice.i wish you all well and on another note read your last posts some of you blame people like me or the offenders who try to offer advice for sabotaging this forum ,for once take a closer look at yourselves the other site are brimming yet this is falling apart.

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Message 174161
To Valerie

Posted by dp1 on Mar 02, 2006 03:26 PM | Also by dp1

Gender: Female, Age Bracket: N/A, State: Florida, Country: United States

I didn't realize until you brought it to my attention how the tension got so high in the forums all of a sudden. I know for me I naturally began ignoring more and more threads and posts by certain posters as fewer and fewer victims participated. But, what I ignored is that there doesn't seems to be any victims participating anymore. Am I wrong in thinking we have no victims in the general forums anymore? I looked at the list of recent posters and the latest posts and was shocked.

I can tell you from experience that flame wars aren't productive. I also know when the attacks become so vicious I can't tolerate it anymore and I retaliate that usually sends a strong message, but it's not always in the best interests of the victims either. Sitting back taking personal attacks isn't an option. I am at loss as to how to better balance the forums. And before anyone jumps on me in this forum, I have taken personal responsibility for being too RSO supportive. I believe I can improve in that area. We are obviously far too top heavy with RSOs and their supporters. The last thing I need to do is to add to the existing problem. Where do we go from here? Is there anyone else left on this side? Let's face it Val, if the only non-pedo types left participating in the forums is a vigilanti and POs with swat attire and night sticks there's bigger issues going on here that need to be addressed.

Thread

174161, dp1, Mar 02, 2006 03:26 PM [To Valerie]
      174202, Rejected
      174213, mawmaw, Mar 03, 2006 08:22 PM
      174249, meli, Mar 04, 2006 02:21 AM
            174357, Pending Further Review
            174396, Pending Further Review
      174253, LockEmUp, Mar 04, 2006 03:35 AM
            174358, Pending Further Review
      174287, Valerie, Mar 04, 2006 02:53 PM
            174295, Valerie, Mar 04, 2006 04:16 PM
                  174336, Pending Further Review
      174296, cass117, Mar 04, 2006 04:49 PM [perhaps how you respond]
            174384, Pending Further Review
      174302, mawmaw, Mar 04, 2006 07:37 PM
            174342, Pending Further Review
      174393, Pending Further Review
      174431, Pending Further Review
      174441, Pending Further Review

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Sex Offender Registries, Sex Offenders Search, News, Info and Discussion

Forum: Victims and Survivors CornerThread (Discussion): Where's the Victims?

Message 174296 (In Reply to Message 174161)perhaps how you respond

Message 174161To Valerie

Thread

Forum: Victims and Survivors Corner

Thread (Discussion): Where's the Victims?

Message 174296 (In Reply to Message 174161)
perhaps how you respond

Message 174161
To Valerie