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Forum: Victims and Survivors Corner

Thread (Discussion): For those who have been thru the system?

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Message 172505 (In Reply to Message 172487)

Posted by Quest on Feb 01, 2006 04:33 PM | Also by Quest

Gender: Male, Age Bracket: 50 - 59, State: Minnesota, Country: United States

That was very well done. I cringe when I hear the words god and country together however. I am staunchly leaned away from Christianity.
But in a long life of deriving the nature of man and morality for my self and my children, I have come to the very same conclusions as most good Christians.
Whether morals arise from the evolution of man, or God, or God's designing evolution, makes little difference to the results I perceive.

Two things strike me about sex offenders and sex offender haters. One is that the hatred sounds a great deal like the sort of rot that drives one to offend sexually. I started out on the victim's side but never seem to get around to solutions because I'm too busy trying to calm down the group I wanted to help and defending offenders against god-like people who judge and talk of torture and prisoners getting it up the butt in general prison population.

The second thing is something I have never been able to explain well. It is that the non-sex offender who toys with adultery at local strip clubs or commits adultery or beats his wife is not operating from principles that are any better than the ones who molest children. In fact I believe they are the same principles. The solution to the problem of child sexual abuse is firmly tied with the generally accepted lack of morality among males in particular and females in growing numbers.
We have only erected a false and contradictory barrier in the magic number of 18 years old. It's as if this is the last moral bastion. The only line we will not cross is a state ordained line involving the number of years separating people who have sex. We have gone a little bit nuts about it becasue we seem to have no other place left to put our moral outrage.
The problem and the tradgedy of childsexual abuse is real. But defending the 18 line has watered it down and misdirected the search for root causes. This thinking has allowed us to turn a blind eye to all sorts of abuse and misuse of our sexuality. Putting people firmly on one side or the other of "God's Chosen".

This appalls me because I suspect that a rapist with adult victims could suddenly become a hero if he stabbed to death a child molester while behind bars.

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Message 172487

Posted by forgive on Feb 01, 2006 12:20 AM | Also by forgive

Gender: Female, Age Bracket: 50 - 59, State: N/A, Country: United States

Valerie, I need to explain something I think you and others  may have misunderstood.. While I most certainly do not condone any sex offense, it is my intention to gently bring to reality that those who make this "hate the  sexoffender" thing an energy taking ,time taking, way of life, with little regard for other "crimes" as you will, which are so rampantly going on around them,  that perhaps, we need to look at society from the mountaintop instead of through the peephole in the fence.
I find that people who choose to engage themselves in a conversation with me about sex offenses come away more knowledgeable and understanding with a little different perspective- isn't that what this board is about?
You wrote-"Maybe it will be the last man standing scenario that God is looking for?"I am not sure what you mean. The Bible says that narrow is the way to heaven , and broad is the path to destruction. Not my words, His. 
I did not believe at first , that I was working with so many
 "precaught "sex offenders , drivers who drink- uh huh- bet you know and work with some too, and people who try to  cheat on their work time, by finding ways to be lazy, and on their taxes by inventing things that are not true to save a buck.
 either. 
I needed a reality check .  Got one. If you are surrounded by morallly upright non-offending people good for you. 
  Who is the judge of all this? certainly not you , certainly not I. Who are you, or who am I to say that any crime is more or less sinful than any other?  We all create our own situational ethics and morals, (unless of course we try to live by God's word),  and I find that most people do not have a strong sense of choosing to implement doing the right thing  at ALL times. That is because we are choosing to try to make our society accept our own agendas and trying to be ever so politically correct in our thinking. Bull. Won't work, can't happen, because truth is truth- not ours but God's.  He wins.

Thread

171682, Valerie, Jan 20, 2006 03:36 PM
      171715, forgive, Jan 20, 2006 10:13 PM
            171725, dp1, Jan 21, 2006 02:00 AM [forgive]
                  171740, forgive, Jan 21, 2006 07:43 AM
                        171798, dp1, Jan 21, 2006 04:39 PM
                        171800, dp1, Jan 21, 2006 04:48 PM [Forgive]
                        171830, Valerie, Jan 22, 2006 12:14 AM
                              172392, forgive, Jan 29, 2006 08:30 PM
                        171947, Quest, Jan 23, 2006 11:54 PM
                              171965, Valerie, Jan 24, 2006 03:05 AM
                              171973, june5, Jan 24, 2006 03:43 AM
                                    172012, Quest, Jan 24, 2006 05:44 PM
                                    172098, dp1, Jan 25, 2006 03:45 PM [June]
                              171991, dp1, Jan 24, 2006 04:58 AM
                                    172013, Quest, Jan 24, 2006 05:45 PM
                                    172014, Quest, Jan 24, 2006 05:48 PM
                                          172110, dp1, Jan 25, 2006 04:29 PM [quest]
                                    172394, forgive, Jan 29, 2006 08:45 PM [to 171991]
                                          172401, dp1, Jan 30, 2006 02:16 AM [forgive]
                                                172488, forgive, Feb 01, 2006 12:30 AM
                                                      172500, dp1, Feb 01, 2006 02:18 PM
                                          172456, Valerie, Jan 31, 2006 03:31 PM
                                                172487, forgive, Feb 01, 2006 12:20 AM
                                                      172505, Quest, Feb 01, 2006 04:33 PM
                                                      172509, Valerie, Feb 01, 2006 06:47 PM
                                                            172868, rebel51, Feb 08, 2006 07:28 AM
                              172111, dp1, Jan 25, 2006 04:34 PM [quest]
                                    172134, Quest, Jan 25, 2006 06:35 PM
                                          172184, cass117, Jan 26, 2006 02:43 PM [male therapists]
                                                172209, Quest, Jan 26, 2006 10:11 PM

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Forum: Victims and Survivors CornerThread (Discussion): For those who have been thru the system?

Message 172505 (In Reply to Message 172487)

Message 172487

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Forum: Victims and Survivors Corner

Thread (Discussion): For those who have been thru the system?