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Forum: Victims and Survivors Corner

Thread (Discussion): Safe Haven For Victims and Families and those who aren't sure if they witnessed one

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Message 170169 (In Reply to Message 169925)

Posted by rebel51 on Dec 29, 2005 12:22 PM | Also by rebel51

Gender: Female, Age Bracket: 50 - 59, State: California, Country: United States

hello and welcome to the forum. I am glad that you dont feel like a victim! That makes life so much easier. It sounds like you felt that the police were more abusive than the person that was doing the abusing. I think that sometimes the police should have to bring in people that are used to dealing with the children of abuse rather than trying to deal with the children themselves.
When I was about 20 I had a son that died...the police had no clue how to handle someone who had just lost a child..the officer that took me off by myself did everything but accuse me of killing the child, I spent the next few days thinking that I was going to be arrested. Yes, sometimes the police need expert help with the people they deal with that are NOT criminals!
I am very sorry that you had to go thru that as a child!
I am also glad that you have decieded to end the cycle of abuse and hate by forgiving..that is one of the things I have the most trouble with. keep up the good work and I hope that you feel all better now and you have a good New Years.

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Message 169925
A bit Confused...

Posted by ForeverTomorrow on Dec 23, 2005 01:58 AM | Also by ForeverTomorrow

Gender: Female, Age Bracket: 18 - 20, State: Minnesota, Country: United States

Well, I suppose I could share my story.  I really havent given it much thought.  I was in 6th grade when it stopped (I'm in 11th as of now), the cops took me out of class and harrassed me for answers to questions that they would not ask (they just said, "you know what happened, tell us"...I did not know what they were talking about I might add, so I was terrified).  I really cant give you a time when it started.  I know I was not the only victim however.  I do not remember the abuse so I do not know if it has effected me at all (though I'm diagnosed with Post Tramatic Stress Syndrom).  I do not however hold this abuse against the person who did it.  I forgive it, he's in jail and serving consequences.  However, he was also a victim.  I'm sure this is quite common.  Please do not misunderstand me, I believe what he did was wrong and he doesnt have excuses.  I just think that maybe if those who hurt him would have been stopped (because they were girls this wasnt possible, plus this was a long time ago) he might not have continued the path.  Just my bit of rambeling, I'd enjoy to hear from anyone back.  (Oh, and I have the flu so I'm quite out there at the moment, dont mind me if a lot that I've said doesnt make a lot of sense..)

Oh, and why I posted here.  I use the word "victim" because its common.  But, I still do believe the lies I was told, though I shall never repeat what they were because they were disturbing.  
Also, part of the reason I mentioned that he was a victim is because many wont admit guys can be victims as well.

Thread

166353, momhelpingbyherself, Nov 03, 2005 08:34 PM [All Victims and Families, advocates, a...]
      166411, deadmomwalking, Nov 04, 2005 03:22 AM
            166457, momhelpingbyherself, Nov 04, 2005 03:55 PM [deadmomwalking and dp1]
                  166511, dp1, Nov 05, 2005 03:20 AM [Momhelping]
                        166633, momhelpingbyherself, Nov 06, 2005 12:11 AM [dp1]
            167114, momhelpingbyherself, Nov 10, 2005 08:32 PM [deadmomwalking]
      166429, Navigatr1, Nov 04, 2005 12:46 PM [On Right Track]
            166458, momhelpingbyherself, Nov 04, 2005 03:56 PM [navigatr1]
      166449, dp1, Nov 04, 2005 03:27 PM
      166454, momhelpingbyherself, Nov 04, 2005 03:51 PM [i need to make a correction]
      166456, anti, Nov 04, 2005 03:54 PM [cool...]
            166634, momhelpingbyherself, Nov 06, 2005 12:13 AM [anti]
      166684, Valerie, Nov 06, 2005 05:48 PM
            166688, PVulcan, Nov 06, 2005 06:06 PM
                  166693, momhelpingbyherself, Nov 06, 2005 06:19 PM [PVulcan]
            166690, momhelpingbyherself, Nov 06, 2005 06:11 PM [valerie]
      166692, Valerie, Nov 06, 2005 06:19 PM
            168379, momhelpingbyherself, Dec 01, 2005 03:50 PM [since my pc has been down i am ...]
      166737, DoTheCrimeDoTheTime, Nov 07, 2005 01:46 AM [Sitting on The Fence]
            166744, momhelpingbyherself, Nov 07, 2005 03:10 AM [dothecrimedothetime]
            166751, dp1, Nov 07, 2005 03:35 AM
            166753, dp1, Nov 07, 2005 03:53 AM
                  166760, DoTheCrimeDoTheTime, Nov 07, 2005 06:10 AM
                        166782, momhelpingbyherself, Nov 07, 2005 04:20 PM [dp1 and dothecrimedothetime]
                              166863, dp1, Nov 08, 2005 02:23 AM [Momhelping]
                                    166902, momhelpingbyherself, Nov 08, 2005 01:43 PM [dp1]
            168380, momhelpingbyherself, Dec 01, 2005 03:55 PM [dothecrimedothetime]
                  168870, steve, Dec 08, 2005 04:34 AM
                        169856, momhelpingbyherself, Dec 21, 2005 02:38 PM [steve]
      166815, Valerie, Nov 07, 2005 07:51 PM
            166823, momhelpingbyherself, Nov 07, 2005 08:27 PM [valerie]
      166846, Valerie, Nov 08, 2005 12:54 AM
            166903, momhelpingbyherself, Nov 08, 2005 01:45 PM [valerie]
      169925, ForeverTomorrow, Dec 23, 2005 01:58 AM [A bit Confused...]
            170018, Valerie, Dec 24, 2005 06:18 PM
            170021, momhelpingbyherself, Dec 24, 2005 08:05 PM [forevertomorrow]
            170169, rebel51, Dec 29, 2005 12:22 PM

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Sex Offender Registries, Sex Offenders Search, News, Info and Discussion

Forum: Victims and Survivors CornerThread (Discussion): Safe Haven For Victims and Families and those who aren't sure if they witnessed one

Message 170169 (In Reply to Message 169925)

Message 169925A bit Confused...

Thread

Forum: Victims and Survivors Corner

Thread (Discussion): Safe Haven For Victims and Families and those who aren't sure if they witnessed one

Message 169925
A bit Confused...