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Message 166073 (In Reply to Message 166068)

Posted by dp1 on Nov 01, 2005 04:49 PM | Also by dp1

Gender: Female, Age Bracket: N/A, State: Florida, Country: United States

I cannot explain why others failed to respond in your defense

I suppose I am not realistically expecting you to, but I do expect others to think about how continuous personal attacks can really tear down the walls of respect and support.

One of the things that Orolan and I do now when we are so pissed off that we are ready to kill each other is that we'll privately work things out. I know when I took my break from the forum he didn't hesitate to ask me about it privately. Unfortunately, he probably got more of a response than he anticipated. I respect the fact that he at least took the time to ask me privately without bickering or whatever. I can say that I gave him an earful and he could have very easily slammed me for just about everything that was pissing me off at the time. But he didn't. He does have empathy, compassion and the ability to be supportive in his own way. I was wrong and I thank him for that. It's funny how we get these preconceived notions about each other isn't it?

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Message 166068

Posted by rabbitreborn on Nov 01, 2005 04:25 PM | Also by rabbitreborn

Gender: Male, Age Bracket: N/A, State: Florida, Country: United States

Again, I apologize for not having responded to something of that nature.  Without trying to sound like I'm making any excuses here, you will notice that I was not responding to many if any posts at that time. Every now and then I have to be away from my computer for an extended period of time and if I'm not mistaken, I was out of town at the time this was posted and I did not read it until you just posted it here.  This , in my opinion, was an uncalled for personal attack.and you had every right to respond, and I applaud your restraint for not responding.

I cannot explain why others failed to respond in your defense, but I can say that I will be monitoring more closely what is being said, and responding as I see fit.I don't advocate anyone attacking another person either here on the forums or in person face to face.  I would hope that a peaceful resolution can be found and that we could all get along, but in the real world, not everyone is always going to be peaceful.  In the real world, sometimes people are going to take things the wrong way.  Maybe I read more into Momhelpingbyherself's original post, maybe her intent was not to attack others, but as many other people also responded, it would seem to me that the general tone of her post was the same to everyone, and it was taken by more than just me as an attack against RSO's in general.  If you notice, I choose not to give an angry response, but rather to take each of her points and respond to them in a civil tone.  That won't always happen, I too can get VERY angry, but I have learned to try to control my temper and walk away.  Unfortunately, sometimes, when the day has gone to the dogs, the fingers respond quicker than the legs do and I lash out just like everyone else.  I'm working on that, bear with me and you will find that I usually will apologize once the rational side of my brain takes back control.

Does this make it right for anyone to lash out?  No, definately not, but we are all fallible humans and it will happen to all of us eventually.  The rules do need to apply to everyone equally, and recently, when I felt someone was "attacking" you (even though the post was not directed specifically at you) I spoke up and told them I thought they were out of line.  Dad and navigator happen to be people whose opinions I regard as highly as I regard your opinion.  They seem to be pretty stand up guys, but when they made the remarks they did, I took offense and let them know it.  In the same token, if orolan or silver or you or Valerie were to make a similar remark, I would speak up and say something.

You're right, being bashed isn't pleasent, but as I said at the start of this topic, I have broad shoulders, and I can take it.  However, I can also deal it out just as easily and I will NOT sit back and fail to defend myself or others.  And, NO, I don't take your posts here about this subject as attacks but reather as an intelligent communication between 2 intelligent people trying to make sense of a very difficult situtation.  :-)

Thread

165453, momhelpingbyherself, Oct 25, 2005 09:45 PM [When does a victim ever get any rights]
      165454, steve, Oct 25, 2005 10:00 PM
            165460, anothen, Oct 25, 2005 11:02 PM
      165464, youtoo, Oct 26, 2005 12:35 AM
      165503, tygerlillie, Oct 26, 2005 05:02 PM [Have a stupid ? well maybe not so stupid]
            165955, 1dadof5, Nov 01, 2005 01:57 AM [tiger]
            166017, Navigatr1, Nov 01, 2005 01:26 PM [Not Stupid]
      165509, rabbitreborn, Oct 26, 2005 06:28 PM
            165511, momhelpingbyherself, Oct 26, 2005 06:49 PM [rabbitreborn]
                  165928, rabbitreborn, Oct 31, 2005 09:48 PM
                        166020, Navigatr1, Nov 01, 2005 01:44 PM
            165542, 1dadof5, Oct 26, 2005 11:37 PM
                  165564, myoung, Oct 27, 2005 07:18 AM [coming and going]
      165558, anti, Oct 27, 2005 05:22 AM [what?]
      165565, myoung, Oct 27, 2005 07:19 AM [driving people away]
            165584, momhelpingbyherself, Oct 27, 2005 01:29 PM [myyoung and 1dadoffive]
                  165939, anti, Oct 31, 2005 10:41 PM [dp left?]
                        165971, dp1, Nov 01, 2005 04:12 AM [Anti]
                              165972, anti, Nov 01, 2005 04:18 AM [thank you...]
                  166022, Navigatr1, Nov 01, 2005 01:49 PM
                  166258, myoung, Nov 03, 2005 06:34 AM [mom]
            165598, dp1, Oct 27, 2005 03:31 PM
                  165601, momhelpingbyherself, Oct 27, 2005 04:13 PM [in a perfect world]
                  165658, myoung, Oct 27, 2005 07:58 PM [dp1]
                        165666, momhelpingbyherself, Oct 27, 2005 11:51 PM [myyoung No So's Rso'...]
                              166259, myoung, Nov 03, 2005 06:41 AM [mom]
                        165700, kids1st, Oct 28, 2005 06:56 AM
                        165773, rebel51, Oct 29, 2005 03:07 PM
                              165779, myoung, Oct 29, 2005 05:17 PM [reb]
                                    165788, momhelpingbyherself, Oct 29, 2005 06:21 PM [myyoung]
                                          166260, myoung, Nov 03, 2005 06:46 AM [mom]
                                    165823, rebel51, Oct 30, 2005 01:20 PM
                                          166262, myoung, Nov 03, 2005 07:16 AM [rebel]
                                                166266, rebel51, Nov 03, 2005 08:01 AM
                                                      166280, myoung, Nov 03, 2005 01:27 PM [reb]
            166021, Navigatr1, Nov 01, 2005 01:47 PM [I agree]
      165616, momhelpingbyherself, Oct 27, 2005 04:49 PM [to sit things straight]
            165930, rabbitreborn, Oct 31, 2005 10:13 PM
                  166012, dp1, Nov 01, 2005 12:06 PM
                        166034, rabbitreborn, Nov 01, 2005 02:25 PM
                              166040, dp1, Nov 01, 2005 02:49 PM
                                    166044, dp1, Nov 01, 2005 03:00 PM [My Post]
                                    166068, rabbitreborn, Nov 01, 2005 04:25 PM
                                          166073, dp1, Nov 01, 2005 04:49 PM
                                                166076, rabbitreborn, Nov 01, 2005 05:05 PM
                              166061, dp1, Nov 01, 2005 04:07 PM
                                    166074, rabbitreborn, Nov 01, 2005 04:52 PM
                        166058, Renunciation, Nov 01, 2005 03:43 PM
                              166070, dp1, Nov 01, 2005 04:30 PM
                        166082, momhelpingbyherself, Nov 01, 2005 05:48 PM [dp1]
            166024, Navigatr1, Nov 01, 2005 02:04 PM
                  166083, momhelpingbyherself, Nov 01, 2005 05:55 PM [navigatr1]
                        166264, myoung, Nov 03, 2005 07:24 AM [mom]

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Message 166073 (In Reply to Message 166068)

Message 166068

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