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Message 166020 (In Reply to Message 165928)

Posted by Navigatr1 on Nov 01, 2005 01:44 PM | Also by Navigatr1

Gender: N/A, Age Bracket: N/A, State: N/A, Country: United States

rabbitreborn wrote:

Talk about lack of empathy, talk about running victims away, were I to have come here as a victim, and post about something I needed advise on, and not receive a response for 5 days, I would have left and went elsewhere where, perhaps, the victims advocates were more interested in actually helping victims than in chasing away those that have true advise even if those same people were RSO's.

I think you hit the nail on the head here, and I have to agree. Why can't the victims support each other rather than to have this constant bickering when a sex offender or a supporter responds to a post? I think the constant bickering would run most people off for now the threads become about who should or shouldn't respond to a post rather than about the original poster. momhelpingbyherself needs to get off her high horse, and actually give support to victicms that post in my opinion. She needs to stop bringing her daughter and her into each post. I want to state that this in not an attack on you momhelpingbyherself, but hopefully some constructive criticism. Moreover, you should stop all your harping that sex offenders and their supporters are running people off. It is getting tiring quite frankly. All you are doing is turning each thread into bickering sessions about who is or isn't at fault. It really needs to stop.

I challenge you momhelpingbyherself to actually give support to the victim rather than turning the threads into a bickering session. Refer people to websites such as rainn.org. There are plenty of resources out there on the web for victims.

--Navigatr1

See an abbreviation or acronym, but don't know what it stands for? Consult the Glossary.

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Message 165928

Posted by rabbitreborn on Oct 31, 2005 09:48 PM | Also by rabbitreborn

Gender: Male, Age Bracket: N/A, State: Florida, Country: United States

OK mom, let's get a few things straight.....

<blockquote>And I never saw a post where you said that they should apologize, and if you did, and i over looked it, then i do apologize.</blockquote>
I did, and that is all I intend to say on the matter.

<blockquote>But rabbit, you have been abusive to me on several occassions, so lets not go there. </blockquote>
As I stated in MY post, OTHER than an issue I had with you, I have NEVER been abusive to a victim. I have tried to be respectful and let my issue with you go away, please do the same.

<blockquote>And i doubt if anyone of the veterans will be back.</blockquote>
Well as I have seen both DTCDTT and DP1 posting, I would say you were wrong on this prediction. Hopefully they stay because I feel we need people like them to help BOTH sides of this issue.

<blockquote> Well lets see, my sister was in Rita, I was in a tornado, so that is putting quite a few peoples feelings on a raw nerve.</blockquote>
And again, you have my heartfelt sympathy. I too have been in numerous storms, everything from being on the beachfront in Miami during Andrew, to having a Tornado drop out of the sky directly overhead while pumping gas at a service station. I know they can be terrifying, and that is why I immeadiately took offense to such a callous statement. However, I also know they can be one of the most beautiful events that mother nature can show us if observed from a safe distance. Kind of Mother Nature's way of reminding us just how small and petty we really are in the face of her wrath.

<blockquote>and of course, your right, i never mentioned names rabbit, so what are you being so offensive about. our problems our ours. but yet here you are in victims forum opening your mouth to me. maybe showing remorse to victims, would show that you aren't like the others, and you wouldn't be put in a catagory that you seem to think that i am putting you in, which i didn't.</blockquote>
whew, this one is more like a 3 parter.... First, I was not being offensive, and if this is how you took my comments, I appologize, they were never intended to be that way, I was merely trying to answer your post. Secondly, I was not "opening my mouth" to you in an attempt to be offensive, I was answering a post you made giving my feelings on the matter. Had you not wanted input from RSO's then you should have stated it in the subheading of your original post and I would not have commented. And lastly, I have ALWAYS shown nothing but remorse for MY victim, and Empathy to all victims in general (remember I was a victim at one time too so I know what they are going through). Never did I say you were pigeon holeing me along with the "others", in fact, if anything, I singled myself out from many by taking issue with some of the things I have heard other RSO's say. Heck even Orolan admitted mine was more the voice of reason as opposed to his hot tempered and "cold" responses.

<blockquote>Am i leaving, not on your luckiest day, rabbit, i will be here, everyday that i can, standing up for all victims, until they can realize they can feel like be strong and take back what was taken from them</blockquote> 
Great, never did I ask you to leave, nor would I. The more voices in this whole issue, the better in my opinion.

<blockquote>. And yea, i think that was a personal attack, since it was made in the victims forum. and i don't need your luck for me or my daughter, because we take care of ourselves, and with the help of a few unmentioned again friends from here</blockquote> 
What part of that felt like an attack to you? I was merely wishing you luck in all that you do. Would you have prefered that I post it in another forum? I answered your post in the forum in which you posted it, I was calm and respectful throughout my entire post. I misinterpreted the comment you made to be your goodbye, and instead you take my words and throw them back at me as though I was attacking you? Do you always interpret empathy and caring as a personal attack?

<blockquote> and as for jenclink, i pm her. </blockquote>
I brought up the jenclick post as an example of the lack of attempt by so called Victim advocates to assist this person, this in my opinion is NOT the way you show that you care about victims. I am glad that you are still in contact with her and hopefully she can work through her issues, but the FACT remains that for 5 days, NOONE stepped forward to assist her. Talk about lack of empathy, talk about running victims away, were I to have come here as a victim, and post about something I needed advise on, and not receive a response for 5 days, I would have left and went elsewhere where, perhaps, the victims advocates were more interested in actually helping victims than in chasing away those that have true advise even if those same people were RSO's.

Thread

165453, momhelpingbyherself, Oct 25, 2005 09:45 PM [When does a victim ever get any rights]
      165454, steve, Oct 25, 2005 10:00 PM
            165460, anothen, Oct 25, 2005 11:02 PM
      165464, youtoo, Oct 26, 2005 12:35 AM
      165503, tygerlillie, Oct 26, 2005 05:02 PM [Have a stupid ? well maybe not so stupid]
            165955, 1dadof5, Nov 01, 2005 01:57 AM [tiger]
            166017, Navigatr1, Nov 01, 2005 01:26 PM [Not Stupid]
      165509, rabbitreborn, Oct 26, 2005 06:28 PM
            165511, momhelpingbyherself, Oct 26, 2005 06:49 PM [rabbitreborn]
                  165928, rabbitreborn, Oct 31, 2005 09:48 PM
                        166020, Navigatr1, Nov 01, 2005 01:44 PM
            165542, 1dadof5, Oct 26, 2005 11:37 PM
                  165564, myoung, Oct 27, 2005 07:18 AM [coming and going]
      165558, anti, Oct 27, 2005 05:22 AM [what?]
      165565, myoung, Oct 27, 2005 07:19 AM [driving people away]
            165584, momhelpingbyherself, Oct 27, 2005 01:29 PM [myyoung and 1dadoffive]
                  165939, anti, Oct 31, 2005 10:41 PM [dp left?]
                        165971, dp1, Nov 01, 2005 04:12 AM [Anti]
                              165972, anti, Nov 01, 2005 04:18 AM [thank you...]
                  166022, Navigatr1, Nov 01, 2005 01:49 PM
                  166258, myoung, Nov 03, 2005 06:34 AM [mom]
            165598, dp1, Oct 27, 2005 03:31 PM
                  165601, momhelpingbyherself, Oct 27, 2005 04:13 PM [in a perfect world]
                  165658, myoung, Oct 27, 2005 07:58 PM [dp1]
                        165666, momhelpingbyherself, Oct 27, 2005 11:51 PM [myyoung No So's Rso'...]
                              166259, myoung, Nov 03, 2005 06:41 AM [mom]
                        165700, kids1st, Oct 28, 2005 06:56 AM
                        165773, rebel51, Oct 29, 2005 03:07 PM
                              165779, myoung, Oct 29, 2005 05:17 PM [reb]
                                    165788, momhelpingbyherself, Oct 29, 2005 06:21 PM [myyoung]
                                          166260, myoung, Nov 03, 2005 06:46 AM [mom]
                                    165823, rebel51, Oct 30, 2005 01:20 PM
                                          166262, myoung, Nov 03, 2005 07:16 AM [rebel]
                                                166266, rebel51, Nov 03, 2005 08:01 AM
                                                      166280, myoung, Nov 03, 2005 01:27 PM [reb]
            166021, Navigatr1, Nov 01, 2005 01:47 PM [I agree]
      165616, momhelpingbyherself, Oct 27, 2005 04:49 PM [to sit things straight]
            165930, rabbitreborn, Oct 31, 2005 10:13 PM
                  166012, dp1, Nov 01, 2005 12:06 PM
                        166034, rabbitreborn, Nov 01, 2005 02:25 PM
                              166040, dp1, Nov 01, 2005 02:49 PM
                                    166044, dp1, Nov 01, 2005 03:00 PM [My Post]
                                    166068, rabbitreborn, Nov 01, 2005 04:25 PM
                                          166073, dp1, Nov 01, 2005 04:49 PM
                                                166076, rabbitreborn, Nov 01, 2005 05:05 PM
                              166061, dp1, Nov 01, 2005 04:07 PM
                                    166074, rabbitreborn, Nov 01, 2005 04:52 PM
                        166058, Renunciation, Nov 01, 2005 03:43 PM
                              166070, dp1, Nov 01, 2005 04:30 PM
                        166082, momhelpingbyherself, Nov 01, 2005 05:48 PM [dp1]
            166024, Navigatr1, Nov 01, 2005 02:04 PM
                  166083, momhelpingbyherself, Nov 01, 2005 05:55 PM [navigatr1]
                        166264, myoung, Nov 03, 2005 07:24 AM [mom]

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Message 166020 (In Reply to Message 165928)

Message 165928

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