Forum: Victims and Survivors Corner

Thread (Discussion): Only God can heal an abused person— Mrs Princess Olufemi-Kayode

How would you advise parents?

I think the most important thing is parent-child communication. If you are your child’s friend and you are able to teach your child sex education, when she is being abused, she will speak out. Children can’t speak out because there is no platform for that kind of rapport. And sex is everywhere so you need to explain why, because whether you like it or not, the children will come across it. You’ll be surprised what ten-year-olds know, not to talk of teenagers. And if you don’t tell them what is proper, they will be abused.

Body parts should be called by their names and they should be told that it is precious and nobody has the right to touch it. If she knew this the first time it happened, you would have been the first person she would have come to no matter the threat or enticement because the abuser will say, “I will give you biscuit” and the child will come back and that shows that for some children, they needed something that the parents are not giving, so something was missing. So love is not just buying gifts for your children or going out to make money for them. Love is spending time with them, sharing your thoughts and listening to them. Parents need to make out time for their children otherwise, Nigeria is in for a big trouble. They are going to be raising demented, emotional people. Children should also speak out.

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