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Forum: Victims and Survivors Corner
Thread (Discussion): StatutOry Rape
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Message 142482 (In Reply to Message 142418)
dp1
Posted by myoung
on Dec 17, 2004 02:13 PM | Also by myoung
| Gender: N/A,
Age Bracket: N/A,
State: Pennsylvania,
Country: United States |
I completely understand the family dynamic that goes on when the inner family circle is ill and why sex crimes often go unreported
My ex hubby (the one who passed away) has a family like that. His brother Mitch began molesting, humiliating and torturing his daughter when she was 8 and it lasted until she was 15. He had not had actual intercourse up to that point (when she turned 15). But, because she was getting her more relevant female body enhancements, she feared that this would be the next step. She struggled a very very long time with "telling" because she knew what would happen to her family, her sister, her mother and the humiliation of the trial since she was now in high school. She told her best friend what had been going on and she encouraged her to tell her mother. Her mom believed her without question (Deb is a wonderful mother but, like many, just couldn't see what was going on.....not sure if she suspected but she threw him out the very day her daughter spilled the beans so she was taken by surprise for sure). They went to the authorities and the investigation began.
Mitch fessed up and spent 7 years in jail. Anyway, at the trial, her paternal grandmother, after hearing Mitch's confession on the stand and his rationale for why it was acceptable.....went off on my niece and asked her how she could do such a horrible thing to her father....she asked her what type of girl she was....she basically blamed her for every single thing that happened during the abuse years. It makes me sick. I always suspected that my ex had been abused as a young boy but he would never fully admit to it nor speak about it. He held so much in and he drank and drugged like there was no tomorrow. Sadly, he was a super talented musician/singer who, tragically, never got well. He finally died in an alcohol related accident. His life, as a result of his homelife and abuse, was so tragic that it was difficult for me not to excuse his dysfunction after I got to really know his family.
When I blew the whistle on my ex for what happened to my daughter during a weekend visitation when she was three years old, I was cast out completely and the family has made absolutely no contact with us at all since. My daughter is now 16....but, I think it's a blessing in disguise that they've all stayed away....they are all so ill....every single one of them. I remember how difficult it was to blow that whilstle on my ex after witnessing what happened to my niece and how the family treated her. Deb finally moved away and didn't give her address to anyone. I spoke to her just before she left and she apologized for not disclosing where they were going but she didn't want to put me in the middle if anyone should come around asking about them. Now, I am out two nieces and a good friend I had in Deb. She just felt that disappearing was the safest bet for everyone concerned. I feel that void every single day....the holiday's are the worst.
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Message 142418
Posted by dp1
on Dec 15, 2004 02:41 PM | Also by dp1
| Gender: Female,
Age Bracket: N/A,
State: Florida,
Country: United States |
Thread
125825, xxconfusebabe86xx, Jan 23, 2004 12:42 AM [StatutOry Rape]
125830, DoTheCrimeDoTheTime, Jan 23, 2004 01:32 AM [The Step Method]
125848, poetsdreamscape, Jan 23, 2004 03:34 AM [maybe]
125838, dp1, Jan 23, 2004 02:21 AM [When In Doubt]
125839, mouseinawheel, Jan 23, 2004 02:27 AM
125845, Silverthorne, Jan 23, 2004 03:07 AM [Details?]
141478, witchywoman23, Nov 23, 2004 02:25 AM [He will be charged!]
142287, rebel51, Dec 12, 2004 01:59 PM
142336, dp1, Dec 13, 2004 02:32 PM [Hello]
142356, orolan, Dec 14, 2004 04:38 AM
142361, dp1, Dec 14, 2004 05:32 AM [Orolan]
142387, orolan, Dec 14, 2004 04:25 PM
142366, rebel51, Dec 14, 2004 12:51 PM
142418, dp1, Dec 15, 2004 02:41 PM
142482, myoung, Dec 17, 2004 02:13 PM [dp1]
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