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Forum: Victims and Survivors Corner
Thread (Discussion): Married to a molester?
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Message 120480 (In Reply to Message 120479)
Not from CA - I must have goofed.
Posted by ladyjane
on Oct 25, 2003 10:50 PM | Also by ladyjane
| Gender: Female,
Age Bracket: N/A,
State: Arkansas,
Country: United States |
I have a scrolling wheel on my mouse and I may have hit it. I am in Arkansas. I live out in the country.
One thing: I do NOT want him to get away with this. I as firmly believe he should be arrested as if I were not married to him. I do not understand why they haven't picked him up yet.
Thanks for pointing out to me that it may look like I was hiding something, I'd never thought of that.
Also, maybe it makes me look bad, but having a 16-yo working for you is different from a 12-yo. All these boys worked for him. While going after a 16-yo is pretty repugnant to me, at least somebody that age probably has what it takes to speak up. I don't believe a 12yo would.
He has been calling and calling our house for a few months, asking DH to take him back in, saying they need the money. His parents have also called. To give DH at least some credit (where I'm not entirely sure it is due) he wouldn't have him here. The boy only told after DH refused to hire him back.
I think that is why his parents haven't had DH arrested yet. I think they believe this boy bears some of the blame for trying to get to come back here.
I told his mother that even if her son had called here and said "let me come back so we can have sex" it is still not his fault in any way, because at his age (14 now) that is still not consent, because he is a child.
I am just now realizing that I had an obligation to go to the authorities to begin with. I didn't have proof and I so desperately wanted it to NOT be true.
Hiding it from the community was important to me because of our children, but I am beginning to see that this is not my problem and the important thing is to keep it from happening again. If that means his picture goes on the wall at the store with the other child molesters in this area, so be it.
I didn't want to leave my home because it is going to be so difficult to do - I have horses and I work here from my home - and because I haven't done anything to make me have to leave, but it sure is going to be hard to live in this community after he's been sent away for this.
Thank you all for replying to my post. It is such a relief to be able to express my fears to people who understand.
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Message 120479
oops, didn't even notice
Posted by myoung
on Oct 25, 2003 09:12 PM | Also by myoung
| Gender: N/A,
Age Bracket: N/A,
State: Pennsylvania,
Country: United States |
Thread
120417, ladyjane, Oct 24, 2003 06:48 PM [This is a long story, sorry.]
120418, steve, Oct 24, 2003 07:08 PM [Get counseling for yourself, stay strong]
120419, tessa, Oct 24, 2003 07:46 PM [Please listen.]
120420, tessa, Oct 24, 2003 07:51 PM [Sorry]
120426, orolan, Oct 24, 2003 10:39 PM
120431, PVulcan, Oct 24, 2003 11:17 PM
120435, SurvivorForever, Oct 25, 2003 12:49 AM [Lady]
120436, dp1, Oct 25, 2003 01:22 AM [Call 911]
120455, Silverthorne, Oct 25, 2003 03:57 AM [Call the cops]
120459, myoung, Oct 25, 2003 05:01 AM [just a question, not a criticism]
120464, steve, Oct 25, 2003 01:17 PM
120479, myoung, Oct 25, 2003 09:12 PM [oops, didn't even notice]
120480, ladyjane, Oct 25, 2003 10:50 PM [Not from CA - I must have goofed.]
120483, steve, Oct 25, 2003 11:26 PM [Leaving home may be temporary]
120510, ladyjane, Oct 26, 2003 03:08 PM [Leaving would be a matter of ...]
120517, orolan, Oct 26, 2003 04:59 PM
120557, myoung, Oct 27, 2003 12:51 PM [mixed bag]
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