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Forum: Polls

Thread (Discussion): Poll 1015 - In your opinion, what is the minimum requirements for an image to be considered child po

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Message 155760 (In Reply to Message 155583)

Posted by confusedgf on Jul 11, 2005 11:19 AM | Also by confusedgf

Gender: Female, Age Bracket: 40 - 49, State: Virginia, Country: United States

dp, there is no point in conversing with you as you enjoy placing so many of us (myself included) into boxes. I would like for you to go back through anyone of my posts and SHOW me anywhere I've indicated that 1) I live with a sex offender, 2) that my children have been around this person since I've KNOWN he was an offender. Again, the offense took place many months before I met him and it was NOT reported by the victim until AFTER he met me. Do I try to get help for him? YES. Do I try to find encouraging ways for him to deal with his problem? ABSOLUTELY. Do I put my children's safety at risk, NO. So keep your condeming thoughts to yourself..or not..I dont' really care. You and a lot of society like you are so eager for answers without asking the first question in trying to understand. Don't stereoptype me, dp...I don't fit your cookie cutter.

Get on with you life dp...and I appreciate your prayers...that's what the world needs more of...more prayers and less condemnation.

See an abbreviation or acronym, but don't know what it stands for? Consult the Glossary.

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Message 155583

Posted by dp1 on Jul 09, 2005 08:05 PM | Also by dp1

Gender: Female, Age Bracket: N/A, State: Florida, Country: United States

<blockquote>Strange view of "prevention" dp1.</blockquote>
So what you are saying is that it is the Government’s responsibility to control sex offenders and protect our children. YOU have no responsibility whatsoever. So it’s ok for you to date, marry or associate with a KNOWN offender and allow your children to be around this sickness. Prevention to YOU means to look every other place in the world for answers to the dilemma of sexual abuse instead of taking responsibility yourself by simply eliminating this evil element in your life. There is nothing more effective to preventing abuse than simply eliminating the possibility of abuse. Taking the abuser or the children out of the equation works. YOU have control to make this difficult decision and have chosen to live in a risky situation. I will pray for the safety of your children.

<blockquote> How can one keep sex offenders away from their children if they don't know they are offenders?</blockquote>

This is not relevant to this discussion. You know this man is an offender and are failing to keep him away from your own children. Who in the world has more control than you over this situation? Nobody. Who is charged with the responsibility to protect their kids? You are. The Government helps out by posting known offenders on the websites and places restrictions on them in regards to their parole conditions. This is not an end all to the problem as you have so graciously reminded us.

<blockquote> Do you lock up every sex offender twice?</blockquote>

Sex offenders need to be locked up when they break the law or violate their conditions of parole. It’s not important how many times they go to jail as long as they are in jail not reoffending or placing the community at risk, again.

<blockquote> Does prevention not include support and counseling?</blockquote>

Absolutely. We should always support a sex offender’s efforts when it comes to rehabilitation. Prevention is not limited to counseling. Eliminating high-risk situations is paramount. Not only should we support his efforts in regards to counseling we should also respect the fact that he has issues with children and keep them away from him so his tendencies don’t get the best of him. Teasing sex offenders with children would not be my idea of supporting a sex offender; although I would include that as one of many things some people do to enable abuse. I wouldn’t support an alcoholic by taking him to a bar for lunch; however, I’d offer him a meal in a non-alcoholic environment. Supporting sex offenders does not mean enabling risky situations. Sex offenders do not seek out women with children to date simply by accident. Likewise, an alcoholic doesn’t just by accident end up at the local friendly tavern for a bite to eat.

<blockquote> And, in your opinion, should all sex offenders be locked up for life?</blockquote>
Nope. Only some should be. Hopefully, the rest can be rehabilitated and keep their hands off children.

<blockquote> Who pays the bill---and who cares for the families left behind without an income.</blockquote>

Hopefully anyone and everyone with the exception of another abuser stepping into the scene of a vulnerable women with children buying his way into her life, befriending her and her kids, then abusing that trust. There are unfortunately so many pitiful situations where the single mom is so desperate for love, money or support that she once again makes a bad choice. It’s a vicious cycle. Abusers are well aware of this abuse cycle and are able to continue their behavior. There are plenty of women without children they could date or be friends with. But, unfortunately the attraction isn’t there if no children are involved. Sad, isn’t it?

<blockquote> What other programs that support victims of abuse will be affected because the government is paying the bill for sex offenders to sit in prison cells. </blockquote>

Prison is supporting victims or potential victims. Counseling has never been proven to be more effective than incarceration.

Sure, why not? How would you feel if your mother let you live with a pervert who molested you? What if your mother let you play on a busy highway? Or what if she locked you in a closet for a month? This is a no-brainer. It’s not 100% the offenders fault if the mom enabled the situation as well. It’s common sense to most of us not to allow sex offenders around our children. Maybe not to you. But some other things might be common sense to you. How about quitting smoking so you lower your risks of lung cancer? Makes sense, no?

<blockquote> Scary to think you are in a position that I would assume has a primary responsibility for finding ways to keep people out of prison...seems your goal is to get them back there.</blockquote>

Ah, let’s get down to business here. This one’s my favorite of all your comments. How distorted can views get? The primary responsibility is to keep the community safe. That would include you and your children by the way. Think about this and let this digest for a few moments. Think about your own thinking errors and how somehow your primary focus is not the kids but the offender. My goal is NEVER to keep the offender out of prison nor is to ALWAYS keep him in prison. If we are able to focus solely on the primary goal of safety without being sidetracked or misguided it all falls into place very easily. One must put her priorities in order first to think clearly and make responsible decisions. Would it be responsible for me as a Probation Officer to allow a sex offender to drink too much? Live with children? View porn? Skip therapy sessions? Not pay restitution for victim’s counseling? No it wouldn’t. Is it mean to lock up an offender who clearly does not comply with his conditions? No it isn’t. When I lock up an offender for VOP or reoffending does that mean I hate ALL offenders? No it doesn’t. All locking up an offender does is take the known abuser out of the equation and that’s a pretty good start to preventing future assaults. Would you agree?

Thread

121936, admin, Nov 19, 2003 04:30 PM [Introduction]
      151940, mysticfyre, May 18, 2005 06:15 PM [Pictures]
      151951, orolan, May 18, 2005 08:52 PM
            151969, innermostfrustrated, May 19, 2005 12:51 PM [pictures]
                  153236, meister82, Jun 08, 2005 04:23 PM
                        155113, mawmaw, Jul 04, 2005 05:31 PM
                              155193, orolan, Jul 05, 2005 01:09 PM
                                    155342, mawmaw, Jul 06, 2005 10:42 PM
                                          156255, 1dadof5, Jul 15, 2005 07:21 AM
                                    155343, mawmaw, Jul 06, 2005 10:47 PM
                                          155392, 1dadof5, Jul 07, 2005 02:25 PM
                                    155491, confusedgf, Jul 08, 2005 07:50 PM
                                          155496, dp1, Jul 08, 2005 09:22 PM
                                                155497, confusedgf, Jul 08, 2005 10:28 PM
                                                      155505, dp1, Jul 09, 2005 02:47 AM
                                                            155521, confusedgf, Jul 09, 2005 02:02 PM
                                                                  155583, dp1, Jul 09, 2005 08:05 PM
                                                                        155617, Rejected
                                                                        155618, mawmaw, Jul 09, 2005 11:31 PM
                                                                              155761, confusedgf, Jul 11, 2005 11:24 AM
                                                                                    155841, dp1, Jul 12, 2005 04:11 AM [mawmaw]
                                                                                          155902, confusedgf, Jul 12, 2005 02:14 PM [mawmaw and d...]
                                                                                                155908, dp1, Jul 12, 2005 02:51 PM
                                                                                                      155939, confusedgf, Jul 12, 2005 06:46 PM
                                                                                                            155967, PVulcan, Jul 13, 2005 07:02 AM
                                                                                                                  155974, dp1, Jul 13, 2005 08:56 AM
                                                                                                                        156031, confusedgf, Jul 13, 2005 03:06 PM
                                                                                                                  156030, confusedgf, Jul 13, 2005 03:03 PM
                                                                                                            156018, dp1, Jul 13, 2005 01:54 PM
                                                                                                                  156034, confusedgf, Jul 13, 2005 03:09 PM
                                                                              155792, 1dadof5, Jul 11, 2005 07:01 PM
                                                                                    155840, dp1, Jul 12, 2005 04:08 AM [Dad]
                                                                              156253, 1dadof5, Jul 15, 2005 07:17 AM
                                                                        155760, confusedgf, Jul 11, 2005 11:19 AM
                                                                              155844, dp1, Jul 12, 2005 04:36 AM
                                                                                    155896, confusedgf, Jul 12, 2005 01:45 PM
                                                                                    155899, confusedgf, Jul 12, 2005 02:02 PM
                                                                                          155910, dp1, Jul 12, 2005 03:04 PM
                                                                                                155941, confusedgf, Jul 12, 2005 06:51 PM
                                                                                                      155964, dp1, Jul 13, 2005 04:25 AM
                                                                                          155915, steve, Jul 12, 2005 03:18 PM [Priv...]
                                                                                                155942, confusedgf, Jul 12, 2005 06:54 PM
                                                                                                      156252, 1dadof5, Jul 15, 2005 07:10 AM [what makes me...]
                                                      155576, PVulcan, Jul 09, 2005 06:49 PM
                                                            155762, confusedgf, Jul 11, 2005 11:36 AM
                                                            156292, confusedgf, Jul 15, 2005 04:40 PM [Referenced info...]
      155440, Scaye, Jul 08, 2005 05:24 AM
            155620, Rejected
            155632, Scaye, Jul 10, 2005 01:22 AM
      155441, Scaye, Jul 08, 2005 05:25 AM
      155955, Teft, Jul 13, 2005 01:53 AM
            156256, 1dadof5, Jul 15, 2005 07:27 AM

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Sex Offender Registries, Sex Offenders Search, News, Info and Discussion

Forum: PollsThread (Discussion): Poll 1015 - In your opinion, what is the minimum requirements for an image to be considered child po

Message 155760 (In Reply to Message 155583)

Message 155583

Thread

Forum: Polls

Thread (Discussion): Poll 1015 - In your opinion, what is the minimum requirements for an image to be considered child po