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Forum: In the News

Thread (Discussion): [nbc6.net] Sex offender kills self after fliers posted in community

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Message 164978 (In Reply to Message 164944)
What to do?


Posted by june5 on Oct 19, 2005 02:31 AM | Also by june5
Gender: Female, Age Bracket: N/A, State: N/A, Country: United States
OK, my own personal sickness is sarcasm so I am going to state in advance that I am not being sarcastic in this post.
Absolutely, "SEX CRIMINALS" are sick. I am not a shrink, but you have to have some serious issues to be a SO. But I also think alot of people are "sick." People who seriously abuse children WITHOUT molesting them are sick as well. About the only good thing about a person being sick is that there is always the chance that they will get better.
This is a dicey issue, and I normally don't speak to anyone about the fact that I was a rape victim 15 years ago. Every victim has a different experience and perception of what happened to them and I can't speak for anyone else.
In my case, I feel very offended when I have a well-meaning friend say "being raped is the worst thing that could ever happen to you" or, "you can't ever get over that." I don't think that really helps anyone.
Again, this is just me, but I am not carrying around the pain of that for the rest of my life. I completely refuse.
I was so depressed and almost suicidal after I was attacked, and I am so glad nobody told me at the time that I would carry that pain for the rest of my life. If I had believed that, I really think I might have tried to take my own life.
Each bad thing that happens to us affects us in some way. I don't think it helps to say we, as victims, can't ever get over it. I know that is easy for me to say, and I am only speaking of my own experience. For a long time, I really wished for something horrible to happen to that guy. After many years, I realized that as long as I hated him, I was still connected to him, and I didn't want to be. I forgave him; I did this for my own benefit, not for his.
I don't know what this guy is doing now. I truly hope that he has gotten some help and become a productive member of society.
There are worse things that could have happened to me--I could have gotten killed or maimed or contracted AIDS. This doesn't make what happened OK.
The only thing I can say for alot of SO's on this board is that many of them seem genuinely contrite and willing to change, and many seem to have changed. Once what is done is done, that is all that we can hope for anyone. I wouldn't take away someone's chance to lead a normal life once they have done their time.
It is a bizzare experience for me, being a rape victim, and now my husband is a convicted SO after we have been married so long. I am just glad that I didn't have to change any of my morals in order to support him now. Alot of people say, "throw the book at em" until one of their family members is accused. Then they do a turn around and say the SO is innocent or needs therapy. It never hurts to try to understand people to begin with.

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Message 164944


Posted by mawmaw on Oct 18, 2005 06:45 PM | Also by mawmaw
Gender: Female, Age Bracket: N/A, State: Pennsylvania, Country: United States

Thread


150261, admin, Apr 22, 2005 02:24 PM [Introduction]
      150268, orolan, Apr 22, 2005 06:44 PM
            150362, 1dadof5, Apr 24, 2005 05:26 AM
                  150385, orolan, Apr 24, 2005 03:49 PM
                        150860, Silverthorne, May 01, 2005 12:22 AM
            150428, PVulcan, Apr 25, 2005 05:13 AM
      150329, anothen, Apr 23, 2005 05:25 PM
      150427, myoung, Apr 25, 2005 05:05 AM [registry]
            150434, dp1, Apr 25, 2005 12:57 PM
                  150438, myoung, Apr 25, 2005 02:54 PM [thanks dp1]
                  150469, orolan, Apr 25, 2005 11:55 PM
                  162638, saintjimmy, Sep 25, 2005 06:33 AM
      150511, orolan, Apr 26, 2005 12:39 PM [Interesting facts]
      150512, orolan, Apr 26, 2005 12:47 PM [Ocala police oppression]
            150520, dp1, Apr 26, 2005 01:47 PM
                  150535, Navigatr1, Apr 26, 2005 03:21 PM
                        150540, newmind6, Apr 26, 2005 04:36 PM
                              150572, poetsdreamscape, Apr 27, 2005 02:08 AM [lawsuit]
                        150566, orolan, Apr 26, 2005 11:20 PM
                              150569, exoffender1, Apr 27, 2005 01:56 AM
                              150576, Crimescholar, Apr 27, 2005 03:30 AM [What is happening????????????...]
                                    150665, orolan, Apr 28, 2005 03:05 AM
            150864, Silverthorne, May 01, 2005 01:01 AM [Checking on?]
      150861, Silverthorne, May 01, 2005 12:33 AM [Details about "Mr. Harris"]
      150862, Silverthorne, May 01, 2005 12:45 AM [The face of hate]
      150863, Silverthorne, May 01, 2005 12:59 AM [His crime]
            150868, orolan, May 01, 2005 02:14 AM
      151060, Navigatr1, May 04, 2005 03:25 AM [How Do You Get That Lonely]
            151061, Navigatr1, May 04, 2005 03:28 AM
                  151115, orolan, May 04, 2005 05:36 PM
                        151146, newmind6, May 05, 2005 01:28 AM
      162404, orolan, Sep 22, 2005 11:44 PM
            162429, dp1, Sep 23, 2005 02:37 AM
                  162479, artie, Sep 23, 2005 03:51 PM
                        162532, dp1, Sep 24, 2005 01:26 AM
                              162577, Navigatr1, Sep 24, 2005 02:04 PM
                              162588, orolan, Sep 24, 2005 05:05 PM
                                    162697, 1dadof5, Sep 26, 2005 05:22 AM
                                    163002, rabbitreborn, Sep 29, 2005 06:05 PM
                                          163042, orolan, Sep 29, 2005 10:24 PM
      164453, iastatso, Oct 13, 2005 06:36 PM
            164558, mawmaw, Oct 14, 2005 10:39 PM
                  164794, june5, Oct 17, 2005 05:02 AM [Oh Well?!!]
                        164823, orolan, Oct 17, 2005 02:56 PM
                              164857, mawmaw, Oct 17, 2005 09:00 PM
                                    164889, june5, Oct 18, 2005 05:46 AM [Reading is Fundamental]
                                    164892, saintjimmy, Oct 18, 2005 08:48 AM
                                    164901, orolan, Oct 18, 2005 02:24 PM
                        164944, mawmaw, Oct 18, 2005 06:45 PM
                              164978, june5, Oct 19, 2005 02:31 AM [What to do?]
                              164981, june5, Oct 19, 2005 02:35 AM [Oops]
                              165005, orolan, Oct 19, 2005 03:21 PM
      165137, Ruined, Oct 20, 2005 11:50 PM
            165192, Rejected
            165232, Navigatr1, Oct 22, 2005 04:26 AM
            165355, orolan, Oct 24, 2005 02:53 AM
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